I have figured out the Valentine's Day conspiracy. It has nothing to do with greeting card companies or the South American floral industry. It's about insecurity. Allow me to explain. Boy meets girl. Boy actually likes girl. February 14 rolls around and fear of said girl having another valentine kicks in. This is where is gets good. Instead of thinking, "I must prove myself superior to all other suitors," boy thinks, "I will make girl undesirable to all other suitors." That's where the chocolate comes in. Ply girl with chocolate...watch her balloon up...presto, she's yours because now she's got her own set of insecurities...I just hope boy likes girl with a little meat (or chocolate) on her bones. I don't actually believe this for a second, but it sounds good considering I've eaten several Dove chocolate hearts today (including two with my breakfast).
All joking and conspiracy theories aside- Happy Valentine's Day. I hope everyone was as lucky as I was to wake up to breakfast (and chocolate) in bed. If not, make your significant other make it up to you.